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Hayden Panettiere breaks silence on younger brother's death: 'I lost half my soul'
View Date:2024-12-24 00:37:52
Hayden Panettiere is opening up about younger brother Jansen Panettiere's death.
In a People magazine interview published Wednesday, the "Nashville" alum opened up about losing Jansen, who died of an undiagnosed heart condition last year at 28.
"He was my only sibling, and it was my job to protect him," Panettiere told People. "When I lost him, I felt like I lost half of my soul."
Her younger brother's death came during the start of a career comeback for Panettiere. She was out of an on-again, off-again relationship with her ex after a highly publicized breakup, and sober after a yearslong struggle with drugs and alcohol addiction, including time spent time at an in-patient rehab facility in early 2020, according to People.
Panettiere also spent time during her first time in rehab while filming the fourth season of "Nashville" in 2015, and in 2021, she entered a 12-step program and began trauma therapy.
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Hayden Panettiere and family mourn'brilliant' Jansen Panettiere, reveal his cause of death
"I had to see horrific paparazzi pictures of myself coming out of Jansen's funeral, which happened in a very private place, and it was shocking," she told People. "My agoraphobia came out, which is something I've struggled with in the past." Agoraphobia is an anxiety disorder that involves fearing and avoiding places or situations that might cause panic and feelings of being trapped, helpless or embarrassed, according to Mayo Clinic.
Panettiere gained weight and "just ballooned out," she told People, saying she "didn't feel confident to put on clothes and get out of the house, but I also knew that I needed to get out and keep moving or I'd never stop looking and feeling this way."
She called the time period "a destructive hamster wheel of, 'do I feel good enough to go out?'" but the star recovered on long walks with personal trainer Marnie Alton, to whom she was introduced by her publicist. She told People that Alton "empowered" her during "these long, beautiful walks where we could vent and it would be this therapy session."
Panettiere told People she has a new outlook on life after losing her brother.
"When something that massive has happened to you, you really learn to pick your fights and just not let the little things upset you," she said in the People interview. "Because once something so horrific, so deep, so catastrophic happens in your life, there's not much that can really rock you."
She continued: "I will always be heartbroken about it. I will never be able to get over it. No matter how many years go by, I will never get over his loss."
Jansen Panettiere death was 'sudden,' family said
At the time of Jansen's death, Panettiere's parents Lesley Vogul and Skip Panettiere said in a statement that his "sudden passing was due to cardiomegaly (enlarged heart,) coupled with aortic valve complications."
"It is with great sorrow we share the tremendous, untimely loss of our beautiful Jansen," the family said.
Cardiomegaly has several causes, with high blood pressure among the most common, per Mayo Clinic. Some people experience no signs or symptoms, while others may experience shortness of breath, an irregular heart rhythm or swelling of the belly or legs.
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